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 A Fresh Look At The Jewish Wedding

                              From the Website:

              http://www.mayimhayim.org/JewishWedding.htm


                            Mayim Hayim Ministries
                            P.O. Box 11911
                            Phx, AZ 85061
                            (623) 937-6141

                            Barbara Di Gilio
                            barbara@mayimhayim.org

      When studying the Scriptures it becomes evident that intimacy
between Yeshua and His E'dah (Congregation), is no better illustrated
than in the ancient Jewish wedding customs. The L-rd gave us these
things so that we could and would understand His attributes. This is
His propose for every Believer. Yeshua, Himself, made several
references to the Church, i.e. Congregation, in being like a Bride
waiting for her Bridegroom. I will not site them here however they
will be found throughout this study. Let's take a look at it:

     The marriage consists of two parts. First, the betrothal - Erusin or
Kidushin. Then about one or two years later, the second part took
place. This is the wedding ceremony called, Nisuin or Huppah.

   The betrothal is a parallel to the engagement in most ways except that
in the ancient Jewish custom, it was binding! It was so binding that
it could not be broken without a orthodox divorce. You were considered
bound together from the period you entered the betrothal contract
until the wedding day. When Joseph discovered that his betrothed wife
Mary was with child he had real grounds to obtain a orthodox divorce
and would have if the angel had not appeared unto him and explained
what was going on. From that point on Joseph knew it was the hand of
G-d that was upon her. He had no more reason to put her away. The
whole marriage rite is laid out in a series of steps, twelve in all. I
will give them numbers and Hebrew Letters, then try to tie in the
Hebrew understanding of these letters with the steps of the marriage.
I say try because there is so much to this teaching, that I'm still
finding wonderful things in the Scriptures. Only Messiah can tells us
all we need to know!

1. Aleph, meaning: Father, strong leader, Ox or Bull.

The Bridegroom's Father chooses the Bride, the Groom in most cases
does not. He sends a friend or a trusted servant to come to terms with
the parents of the prospective Bride, and makes all the arrangements.
The Bride may not have any idea of what this person looks like or even
know his age. All she knows is she will spend her whole life with him
if she says yes to this marriage!

This representative can be seen as a portrait of the Fathers Holy
Spirit in the Scriptures. It is He who nudges our hearts, and calls us
to enter into this union with our Bridegroom Messiah.

John 6:43-44

  "Stop grumbling among yourselves," Messiah Yeshua answered. "No
  one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws them, and
  I will raise them up at the determined day."
  (Adah  Guzman's  Interpretation)

I Peter 1:8

          "Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though
          you do not see Him now, you Believe in Him and are filled
          with marvelous and festive joy,"  AGI

2. Bet, meaning: Household, House or Tent.

   The price was secured for the Bride, and was usually something of
great value. Lands, livestock, silver or gold. In the Believers
instance the supreme price was paid, the precious Blood of Yeshua
Messiah. Yeshua left His Home and the Glory of Heaven to come to earth
to pay the ultimate price for a Bride. This was so He might return
once again to prepared for us a place, a Home with Him in the Glory of
Heaven. What an awesome Bridegroom we have precious ones. Praise His
Holy Name!!!

I Peter 1:18-19

     "For you know that it was not with perishable things such as
     silver or gold that you were redeemed from the superficial way of
     life handed down to you from your forefathers, but with the
     precious Blood of Messiah, the Lamb without blemish or defect."
     AGI

Philippians 2:5-7

     "Let this mind be in you, which was also in Messiah Yeshua: Who,
     being in the form of G-d, did not affect to appear in divine
     majesty; but divested Himself, taking upon Himself the form of a
     servant, and was made in the likeness of men:"  AGI

    Read my Lamentations study for more insight into the word  "form."

3. Gimel, meaning: To lift up, into, a camel.

  The Betrothal ritual is like an engagement party. The promise was made
and it was binding. The man and wife do not live together or have
sexual intercourse at this time. A cup of wine is lifted up and drunk
by the Bride to seal the Betrothal.

   We will say more about the cup when we come to the 6th step - the Vav.
Just remember that the cup is lifted in the right hand. The right hand
is a place of power in the Jewish understanding.

Matthew 26:27-29

     "And Yeshua took the cup in His right hand, lifted it, blessed
     it, and gave it to His followers, saying, 'Drink ye all of it;
     For this is My Blood of the New Covenant, which is shed for many
     for the forgiveness of sins. But I say unto you, I will not drink
     henceforth of this fruit of the vine, until that Day when I drink
     it new with you in my Father's Kingdom.'"AGI

   Yeshua, when lifting the cup at the Passover understood that in just a
short time from that moment, He would also be lifted up on a CROSS. It
would be for His Bride that He would suffer and do this! Over and over
again we will see that He "alone cuts this Covenant," we have no part,
other then to accept what He has done for us.

4. Dalet, meaning: Door, a pathway, entrance, enter.

    The written marriage contract is drawn up and in it the Bride is
promised that she will be provided and cared for in every way. It
states that all of her needs will be fulfill by the Bridegroom. The
Hebrew term for Bridegroom is "Hatan" meaning: "one who enters
Covenant." This contract is always signed before two witnesses, then
given to the Bride and her Father. The Holy Scriptures are our Wedding
document. It tells us all that our Bridegroom has done for us and will
do for us - and so much more!

  Over and over Yeshua Messiah declares His love for us! He promised to
provide for all our needs and our necessities, and so we should never
be fearful. It is Messiah who will make our way straight. It is
Messiah who will accomplish His Word in our lives! He is the Door, our
Pathway by which we can enter into the Fathers House. His cover
dresses us, just as He spoke about it in Matthew's Gospel.

Matthew 6:28-30

     " So why do you worry about your garments? Consider the lilies of
     the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin:
     And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was
     not arrayed like one of these. Wherefore, if G-d so clothe the
     grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is cast into the
     furnace, shall He not much more cover you, O you of little
     faith?" AGI

Phil. 4:19

     "And my G-d will provide, fulfill and meet all your needs
     according to His excellent riches in Messiah Yeshua."   AGI

Hebrews 12:2

     "Looking unto Yeshua the Author and Finisher of our Faith; who
     for the joy that was set before Him endured the Cross, disdaining
     the shame, and has conquered all and is at the right hand of the
     Throne of G-d."   AGI

What more can I say, He will provide for His Bride all things, and His
word is True!

5. Hey, meaning: to reveal, window.

  As I said before, the Bride had to be in agreement with this marriage,
and so it is with us. By our free will do we enter into this contract.
Even the Saints of old were looking ahead to this wonderful place and
event. The writer of Hebrews tells us:

Hebrews 11:8-10

     "By conviction Abraham, when he was called to go out into a
     location which he should after receive for an inheritance, obeyed
     G-d; and he went out, not aware where he went. By conviction
     Abraham abided in the land of promise - as in a foreign country,
     dwelling in tabernacles with his son Isaac and his grandson
     Jacob, the heirs with him of the same promise: For Abraham looked
     for a City which has foundations, whose designer and creator is
     G-d."   AGI

   Today to enter into this Covenant I must accept Messiah Yeshua, and
confess Him with my mouth to be L-RD of my life. When the Messiah is
revealed to us it is by the Servant, the Holy Spirit. We must say "I
do" in Hebrew it is the word `daat,' or I could say, "I do not" which
is not a good answer to give Him. However, making this decision is our
choice.

  Making this selection is really our first act of intimacy. Exclusively
ours because, G-d has given to us free will to choose our Bridegroom.
However, He knew from the beginning what our answer would be!

Jeremiah 33:6

     "Observe, I will bring them health and preserve them. I will cure
     them and I will reveal unto them the fullness of My Peace and My
     Truth." AGI

    This act of choosing our Bridegroom reveals to our L-rd how intimate
we want Him to be with us, and this revealing works both ways. It is a
form of worship, "yada" in Hebrew, and this same word is used for an
intimate encounter in the Word of G-d.

Genesis 4:17

     "And Cain knew (was intimate with), his wife; and she conceived,
     and birthed Enoch: and he founded a city, and called the name of
     the city, after the name of his son, Enoch." AGI

6. Vav, meaning: to secure, a peg or nail.

    At this point the cup was drunk from. This cup is also called the
shared cup of the Brit, i.e. Covenant. The two are now really married.
The betrothed secured, i.e. sealed. Gifts are now given to the Bride
and her family from the Bridegroom or His Servant, as in the case of
Abraham sending his servant Eliezer. Eliezer came with 10 camels
filled with gifts to secure a Bride for Isaac. Eliezer means:
comforter, helper, and is a picture of the Holy Spirit of G-d.

       Every time we share in the cup of Communion we
       are re-affirming our marriage Covenant with
       our Bridegroom Yeshua. We should always
       remember what it was that Messiah Yeshua our
       Bridegroom achieved for us personally, with
       the Covenant of "Communion in His Blood." His
       wine is the best wine, and it is wine, not
       grape juice! Wine is a symbol of joy to the
       Hebrew mind, and it should be to His Church as well.

                        Jeremiah 31:31-34

     "The time is coming," declares the L-RD, "when I will cut a New
     Covenant (Brit) with the house of Israel and with the house of
     Judah. It will not be like the Covenant I made with their
     forefathers (those who died in Mt. Sinai) when I took them by the
     hand to lead them out of Egypt, because they broke My Covenant,
     though I was a Husband to them, declares the L-RD. This is the
     Covenant I will cut with the house of Israel after that time,"
     declares the L-RD. "I will put My Torah in their minds and write
     it on their hearts. I will be their G-d, and they will be My
     people. (This is the Promise from Deut 30:6) No longer will a man
     instruct his neighbor, or a mankind his brother or sister,
     saying, `Know the L-RD,' they will all know me, from the least of
     them to the greatest, declares the L-RD. For I will forgive their
     iniquity and will recall their sins no more."   AGI

   Yeshua Messiah also gave us many gifts. The blessed Holy Spirit with
all of His gifts. Prophecy, Messiah's Peace, His Joy, His Knowledge,
Eternal Life, His Righteousness which is our Cover, and best of all
His Love Everlasting.

   The shared cup of Communion secured by the nails of the Covenant of
the Cross makes us partakers with Him in everything, and it's all His
doing!!!

7. Zayin, meaning: cut, to cut off, a weapon.

  In Hebrew the word for the Jewish Bride is the word "Kallah," meaning:
"complete," and some teach it means: "enclosed one." This brings to my
mind a Scripture from Song Of Songs:

Song of Solomon 4:12

     "A garden enclosed is my sister, my spouse; a spring of living
     water shut up, a fountain sealed." AGI

   The Bride went through a ritual immersion, i.e. washing, to symbolize
her turning aside from all the former things and starting a new life
with her Beloved. We are given water baptism for the purification of
our old ways and to make us ready for our L-rd Heavenly home. When the
Hebrews came out from Egypt and prepared to enter into the Covenant
with Elohim, the whole Congregation had to be cleansed with water. She
was to be set apart, enclosed before they could come close to the L-RD
G-d. We must also do the same? And sometimes for some of us, more then
once. They had to do it before meeting G-d, we now do it after we
receive His Son! I asked the L-rd why? He told me that this washing
was for me, so that I could identify with His Son in all things. I
wept when He told me that.

Romans 6:3-6

     "Know ye not, that so many of us as were immersed into Yeshua
     Messiah were immersed into His death? Therefore we are buried
     with Him by baptism into death: that like Messiah was raised up
     from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should
     walk in newness of life. For if we have been seeded together in
     the likeness of His death, we shall be also in the likeness of
     His resurrection: Knowing this, that our old man is crucified
     with Him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that
     henceforth we should not serve sin."   AGI

     Mikvah: ritual immersion, i.e. baptism is a weapon of
     separation.

  When we obey the L-rd and follow His example of immersion, we are
embarking on our new life by departing and saying, farewell to the old
ways. This is a cutting off or a putting off of the old, and this
pleases both the Father, and the Bridegroom. Really it is a signpost
for ourselves to remind us we are dead to trespasses, and alive unto
G-d.

   Again the choosing is ours to obey or not to obey Him. I have been
sprinkled as a baby, and immersed once in 1973 when I did not really
understand what I was doing. Then again in 1986 with full
understanding I was immersed in the Holy Sprit. Then in 1989 immersed
in water again, this time really knowing what was taking place in my
life. I hope to be immersed again in the Jordan someday when I get to
Israel.

Acts 19:2-6

     "He said unto them, Have you received the Holy Spirit since you
     Believed? And they answered him, We have not even heard whether
     there be any Holy Spirit. And he said unto them, Then what were
     you immersed into? And they said, Into John's ritual immersion.
     Then said Paul, John verily immersed with the immersion of
     repentance, saying unto all the people, that they should Believe
     on Him which should come after him, that is, on Messiah Yeshua.
     When they heard this, they were immersed in the Name of the L-rd
     Yeshua. And when Paul had laid his hands upon them, the Holy
     Spirit came on them; and they spoke with tongues, and
     prophesied."    AGI

   There is water immersion, and there is a immersion of the Holy Spirit,
and they are for whosoever will.

8. Chet, meaning a chamber, separate, private.

   At this point the Bridegroom would depart and go back to his Fathers
house to prepare a place for the wedding and his new Bride. My
understanding is that a pledge is made by the Bridegroom affirming to
his Bride that he will indeed return for her. Yeshua did the same! We
read Yeshua's pledge in St. John's Gospel:

John 14:1-3

     "Do not let your hearts be distressed. Trust in G-d; trust also
     in Me. In My Father's house are many chambers; if it were not so,
     I would have told you. I am going there to make ready a place for
     you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back
     and catch you up to be with Me that you also may be where I am."
       AGI

 These words above are the same words spoken in the ancient Jewish
Wedding rite. Yeshua speaks to His followers as a Bridegroom,
affirming to them that He would come to take them to Himself.
 
 This is when Messiah will come to sequester us in a chamber made ready
for His Bride. A time of separation and intimacy, privacy with our
L-rd. I believe it will be for 7 years. One to match each day that the
Bride and Bridegroom spends in the wedding chamber, alone and
separated from the rest of the world.

Isaiah 26:20-21

     "Come, My people, enter thou into thy chambers (chadar), and shut
     thy doors about thee: conceal thyself as it were for a little
     moment, until the wrath be overpast. For observe, the L-RD cometh
     out of His dwelling to punish the inhabitants of the earth for
     their iniquity: the earth also shall disclose her blood, and
     shall no more cover her dead." AGI

   The time frame is after the 7 years of the indignation, the L-RD's
wrath has passed, not before.

9. Tet, meaning: to surround, a snake, to twist.

Now the time of waiting comes! The Bride would prepare herself making
all the preparations to be the best Bride she could be. She waits with
baited breath for the Bridegroom to come. I know how anxious she is!
She doesn't know the exact time when her Beloved will come for her,
this time is "only" known by the Bridegroom's Father. When the Father
sees that all of His Son's preparations for the wedding chambers
(chadar) is ready, then He will allow His Son to transport His Bride
to His home.

Matthew 25:1-5

     "At that time the kingdom of Heaven will be like ten undefiled
     maidens who took their lamps and went out to meet the Bridegroom.
     Five of them were foolish and five were insightful. The foolish
     ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. The
     wise, however, took oil in jars along with their lamps. The
     Bridegroom was a long time in coming, and they all became sleepy
     and fell asleep."  AGI

 This parable, i.e. midrash is a teaching about "readiness," it is
plain and it is simple. Many of use have looked for a deeper hidden
meaning to Matthew 25, but I believe the right Hebraic understanding
of this is the simple teaching of our L-rd of "readiness."

Readiness speaks of many things to each of us. To me it speaks of a
predisposition towards eagerness or zeal for the coming of the L-rd. I
am full of zeal when I ponder that it could be this year!

At this point in the Bride's life she is surrounded by her family and
friends who she will be leaving very soon. She is filled with
emotions. She may be going on a long journey to the land of her
Husbands home far from her families home.

She is occupied with feelings twisting inside of herself. Maybe even
doubt if her Bridegroom will come for her, cool feet so to speak!
Filled with these emotions the serpent speaks to her mind:

"You are not a worthy Bride, look at all of your flaws. Who would
really what you with all your spots? You are full of wrinkles."

When the enemy of our well being speaks to us we usually listen to his
lies. How foolish we are to listen to him. We are already married to
the Bridegroom, and the Covenant is sealed!

Rebecca was a zealous Bride, enthusiastic to go meet her Beloved
Isaac. She did not vacillate at all, she is the perfect picture of
Messiah's Bride.

He is coming for a Bride who is without spot or wrinkle.

2 Peter 3:13-14

     "Nevertheless we, according to His Promise, look for New Heavens
     and a New Earth, wherein dwelleth righteousness. For what reason,
     beloved, seeing that your looking for such things, be diligent
     that you may be found of Him in Peace, without spot, and
     undefiled." AGI

Ephesians 5:25-27

     "Husbands, love your wives, even as Messiah also loved the
     Congregation, and gave himself for it; that He might hollow and
     absolve it with the washing of water by the Word. That He might
     present it to Himself a glorious Temple, not having spot, or
     wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be sanctified and
     without blemish."AGI

 It was said by the Jewish Sages of old, and even today's Rabbis teach
this truth. That on the day of your wedding the Bride and Bridegroom
stand before G-d without spot, and without blemish. I believe that,
what about you? It is only the devil, the enemy of soul who tells us
otherwise. We must remember the words of our Beloved Bridegroom, and
resist the lies of the devil and his fallen angels.

Isaiah 61:10

     "I will greatly rejoice in the L-RD, my soul shall delight in my
     G-d; for He has clothed me with the garments of Salvation
     (Yeshua). He has covered me with the Robe of Righteousness, as a
     Bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, and as a Bride
     adorneth herself with her jewels."AGI

          It is Yeshua who makes her that way, not herself. He gives
          us our robe, and crowns.

10. Yod, meaning: a deed, to make, hand.

   When the Bridegroom comes to get His Bride it is more of a willing
kidnapping. It could be called a snatching in the middle of the night.
The Bridegroom and His friends would sneak up on the Bride suddenly.
However, not without a shout first! Then there was a blast of the
shofar sounding out, she must be ready to run to her Beloved, to flee
with him with no hesitation or procrastination. I can't wait till I
hear His shout, and the sound of His shofar, how about you?

Matthew 25:6

     "At midnight the shout went out: "Here's the Bridegroom! Come out
     to encounter him!"    AGI

   It is interesting and certainly worth remembering that one of the
names for the Feast of Trumpets according to Jewish literature, is
"The wedding day of Messiah." This whole marriage feast is a picture
of the L-RD coming for His Bride before Yom Kippur, the day of
Judgment. Maybe even this year!

   Messiah has a "deed" for you, its the Ketubah - the Betrothal
Covenant. He is now our Master and our Husband. He has the rights to
come to take us to His home because He paid the "Mohar" - the Bridal
Price. When He comes He will come from the place of Power, i.e. the
Father's right hand. This is the perfect picture of the Yod!

11. Kaf, meaning: to cover, to allow, open hand, arm.

  The Bridegroom with His strong open hand takes His Bride away to the
place that he has prepared, and the marriage is now consummated. The
Tallit (the Jewish prayer Shawl) serves many times today as the
Huppah. Made of silk or fine wool it is raised over the couple. It can
also be held up by poles or trees that may have been planted at the
birth of the Bride or Bridegroom. If he's a rich Bridegroom he may
give her all of her wedding garments before hand, which she gladly
receives as part of his price. Messiah has given use all of our
garments as well!

   Blessings are said over the couple, this is call the Birkot Nisuin,
the 7 blessings. The second cup of wine is now drunk, and this sets
the second seal to the marriage Covenant. We are waiting to drink this
cup with our Bridegroom Yeshua.

   Now the new couple will spend 7 days together in the wedding room, the
"Huppah." This starts the honeymoon cycle, this is were the Bridegroom
will cover her with Himself. This part takes place in the Huppah. This
is also called the "Nisuin" or the "hometaking." Jewish Bridegrooms do
this part today at the wedding by placing their Tallit over their
Brides so all can witness it.

  The new couple will now become one flesh - Echad. This is also called
"Kidushin" meaning: sanctification or ratification. They will get to
know each other like never before, this more than a face to face
encounter. This also has a ancient name, "Yihud" or the "Knowing." The
act of sexual intimacy takes place between the Bride and the
Bridegroom. The bed sheets with her blood on it were given to the
Brides family. This was so they could never say she was not pure
before the wedding day. It was in a sense, her insurance policy. I
believe it will be Messiah's bloody garments that will be our
insurance policy. It is His covering that dresses me, not my own. His
hand is open to me!

I Cor. 13:12

     "Now we see but it is a poor reflection as in a brass mirror;
     then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall
     know fully, even as I am fully known."   AGI

12. L - Lamed, meaning: prod, toward, staff.

  And now it is time for the wedding feast to begin! Our Wedding Feast
will be in the place that Yeshua has prepared. Some say in Heaven, and
others say on the earth after His return. I think it may be on the
earth but I'm not real sure about it. I do know one thing, that were
ever it is, I'll be there with my Beloved Messiah.

  Right after the 7 days of the Huppah, the couple come out of the room
and join their guests. These guests have a special name, they are
called the B'nai Huppah, "children of the Bridal Chamber." They will
join the Bride and Bridegroom to a very festive marriage feast. This
is the meal that the couple share with their guest after the 7 days of
being alone is over. This meal is called Seudat Mitzyah, a festive
meal! Also at the end of the 7 days Yeshua will be crowned King, and
we shall be His Queen. We will rule and reign with our Beloved
forever. This is for Israel and all who are grafted into her.

   Messiah has now been given a Staff, i.e. "The Rod of G-d" to rule
with, just like all the past kings of Israel. The one thousand year
begins, this is the Millennial reign of Messiah on earth. This is the
time of peace we read about in the book Isaiah. This is when the
Bridegroom will rejoice over His Bride.

Isaiah 62:5

     "For as a young man marries a virgin, so shall thy sons marry
     you: and as the Bridegroom rejoiceth over the Bride, so shall
     your G-d rejoice over you." AGI

   Isn't this enough to make you want to shout out to the L-RD, Great is
our G-d, and greatly to be praised, Halleluyah!

Revelation 19:7-9

     "Let us rejoice and be delighted and give Him glory! For the
     wedding of the Lamb has come, and His Bride has fashioned herself
     ready. Fine linen, bright and clean, was given her to wear." (For
     the fine linen stands for the legal rights of the Saints.) Then
     the angel said to me, "Write: Blessed are those who are invited
     to the wedding supper of the Lamb!" And he added, "These are the
     true Words of Elohim - G-d."AGI

  We will dance and play our tambourine like Miriam did, and maybe even
with Miriam! We will hear ourBridegroom rejoicing over us, what a
sensation day this will be!!! A Feast like no other we have ever seen
or heard about, phenomenal to say the least! The proposal is made and
we have accepted. Now the invitations are being sent out to all
Believers who are part of His Bride. Are you ready and waiting for
your Beloved Bridegroom? I am. I'm waiting with a fire in my heart
longing for His return. Messiah gave me a little song years ago about
my lamp. Here are some of the words. 

"You O'L-RD keep my fire burning, You O'L-RD keep it burning bright.
  You O'L-RD keep my fire burning, You O'L-RD keep it burning bright.
  My G-d has turned my darkness My G-d has turned my darkness
My G-d has turned my darkness ~ into Light."


                                  Halleluyah, and Amen!!!

My lamp is illuminated, and He has pressed out fresh oil for my lamp!
So I can now say, I'm waiting for my Beloved to come and whisper to
me, "Come away my beloved, come up, for I have made a place for you.
Come enter the chamber and shut the door that we made be known of each
other, my Bride, my Love."

I will answer my Beloved Bridegroom with "His Word."

Song of Solomon 1:2-4

     "Let Him kiss me with the kisses of His mouth: for His love is
     better than wine. Because of the savour of thy good ointments
     your Name is as ointment poured forth. And accordingly do the
     virgins love thee. Draw me, we will run after thee: the King has
     brought me into His chambers: we will be glad and rejoice in
     thee, we will remember thy love more than wine: the upright love
     thee."  AGI

   My Betrothal is past...

                 I'm Waiting for him...
                 My Wedding Day Is Coming...


Mayim Hayim Ministries
P.O. Box 11911
Phx, AZ 85061
(623) 937-6141

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