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Subject: The Christian Wife: I Peter 3:1-6
Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1998 17:10:30 -0800
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From: Bro. Jim Faires
To: heb_roots_chr@geocities.com
Subject: THE CHRISTIAN WIFE 1 Pet. 3:1-6
THE CHRISTIAN WIFE
1 Pet. 3:1-6
Verse 1-6 says, "Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own
husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be
won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste
conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward
adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of
apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not
corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the
sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy
women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection
unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord:
whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any
amazement."
I am not setting out to deal extensively with these six verses. Neither
will I answer all the questions that this study might provoke. I simply
offer it as passage of Scripture that I would want to understand if I were
a Christian wife. There are certain passages of Scripture that apply
especially to us in a special way. This is one that applies to the
Christian wife. Let's look first of all at . . .
THE SUBJECTION OF THE CHRISTIAN WIFE
Peter says, "LIKEWISE, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands . . ."
The word "likewise" translates "homoios" and means, "likewise,
equally,
in the same way." This connects what Peter is about to say to the example
of Christ in verses 21-25 in chapter two. Jesus is the example for the
Christian wife just like He is the example for the Christian man. The word
"subjection" translates "hupotasso" and means, "to submit to
one's control.
It is a Greek military term meaning to arrange [troop divisions] in a
military fashion under the command of a leader. In non-military use, it was
a voluntary attitude of giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility,
and carrying a burden." Jesus is the example in submission to the Father's
will. His submission to the Father's will meant that as the eternal Son,
God manifest in the flesh, with the power to do otherwise, submitted to man
for the sake of doing His Father's will. The Christian wife is to "follow
in His steps."
The words "to your own husbands" qualify the submission. The wife does not
have to submit to every man that comes along. Paul adds "as unto the Lord"
(Eph. 5:22). This means that when the Christian wife submits to her husband
in obedience to Christ, she is submitting to the Lord. She is also
submitting to her husband. But when it is "as unto the Lord," submission is
to Him first. You say, "Preacher, what is the difference?" ...a lot. If you
always submit to the Lord first, then the submission has to be approved of
Him. If an unsaved husband or a backsliden Christian husband asks you do to
something that will put you in violation of His will, you must not be in
submission in that case.
There are some who teach an unqualified submission. They are wrong. They
say, "If you go ahead and do what your husband says the responsibility of
the wrong act will be his, and God will hold him responsible." I have a
question. What if the husband asks the saved wife to go to bed with another
man? You say, "Her husband will be responsible." I ask another question.
Will he be the one who gets AIDS? This passage teaches, and no other
passage contradicts it, that the saved wife is to submit to Her Lord first,
and in most cases, He will tell her to submit to her husband, even if he is
unsaved. But not all the time. No Christian is to submit to any authority
that causes one to disobey the Lord if he submits. God's authority first is
taught in Acts 4:19: "But Peter and John answered and said unto them,
Whether it be right in the sight of God to hearken unto you more than unto
God, judge ye." Then next Peter mentions . . .
THE POSSIBILITY FOR THE CHRISTIAN WIFE
The possibility is brought in the words, "that, if any obey not the word,
they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives." It
is possible for the Christian wife to win her unsaved husband by doing what
is described in this text.
The words "if any obey not the word" is a reference to an unsaved husband.
The "if" here is a first class condition, i.e., assumed to be true. Here is
a case where a woman hears the gospel and believes it. Her husband does
not. Should she leave him? No, divorce is not an option in such cases. The
Christian wife is being told how to live with a husband if he does not obey
the Word.
The words "they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the
wives." The word "word" does not have a definite article "the"
before it in
the
Greek text. It is literally, "without a word." No man can be won without
THE Word. Peter says in chapter one verse 23: "Being born again, not of
corruptible seed, but of incorruptible, by the word of God, which liveth
and abideth forever." There is no such thing as being saved apart from the
Word of God. But once a person understands the gospel message, he may be
won to Christ without further verbal witnessing, simply by the
"conversation" (the lifestyle) of the wife. This is a marvelous
possibility.
This is what makes the unsaved husband's salvation possible: "while they
behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear." The words "while they
behold" translate "epopteuo" and mean, "to be an overseer, to look
upon,
view attentively." The unsaved are watching. In my almost forty-four years
in the ministry, I have seen several unsaved husbands come to know Christ
as a personal Saviour because they observed the changes in their wives that
salvation wrought. The words "coupled with fear" mean the reverential fear
of the Lord brought about good changes. I love the Lord but I also fear
Him. There are things that I do not do because I fear the consequences.
Jesus is a living Lord, alive right now, active to chasten the disobedient
Christian, and because of this, there are things that I don't do. When the
unsaved husband sees the wife living like God is alive, he sees more in her
than mere religion. He says, "My wife believes that God is real and alive."
Peter says by inspiration of God that there is power in this way of living
to win an unsaved husband to Christ.
Then next Peter mentions . . .
THE DRESS OF THE CHRISTIAN WIFE
Peter speaks of the dress of the Christian wife. He says, "Whose adorning
let in not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of
gold, or putting on of apparel." The word "adorning" translates
"kosmos"
and means, "ornament, decoration, adornment, i.e., the arrangement of the
stars, 'the heavenly hosts', as the ornament of the heavens." Is this
suggesting that a woman is not to keep herself looking nice? Shouldn't she
arrange her hair in an orderly fashion? Is this forbidding makeup? I do not
think so. 1 Cor. 11:15 says that long hair is a glory to a woman. It would
not be if she didn't comb it and arrange it orderly (kosmos). It is
possible to go too far in cosmetics. Proverbs 7:10 says, "And, behold,
there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtle of heart."
The harlot wears clothes that emphasizes the parts of her body that appeal
to lust and that she uses in her trade. The Bible teaches that a Christian
woman is not to dress this way. The Christian woman has a different code of
dress than a woman of the world.
Does this mean it is wrong for a Christian woman to wear jewelry? If it is,
it is a change, because they used it in that day. Some people miss the
punchline of the teaching of this passage and the result is that some
Christian women dress to look like "death eating a cracker!" And the sad
thing is that they think that they are serving the Lord in this manner. The
fact is one draws more attention to the body of flesh this way than if they
hit a "happy medium" and just look like the average conservative woman. The
whole thing is about the Christian woman's witness. It is not to be a
witness through an appeal to the body but a witness in Spirit.
Peter says, "But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is
not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit which is in
the sight of God of great price." The "meek and quiet spirit" is the result
of the Word and the Holy Spirit operating in "the hidden man of the heart."
Being "meek and quiet" is not a natural characteristic. You say, "Preacher
that is not how I am. I just can't do that." God is not asking you to do
what you CAN do. He is asking you to let Him operate in the "hidden man of
the heart" and reproduce Christ's meekness and quietness. To do this you
have to die to self. Self does not die easily. Self makes excuses and
procrastinates and avoids obedience. The Christian woman has it tough
living with an unsaved husband. It is not easy. But I have to believe that
if anything is going to reach that unsaved husband, it is obedience to the
Lord as described in this passage. I can picture a godly woman living with
an unsaved husband. He is mean to her and she refuses to leave because of
her obedience to the Lord. She finally dies and they discover she has made
arrangements for her tombstone. When they put it up, it has her name and
the words FREE AT LAST! There are some dear ladies who have had a good
marriage, who talk about the joy they are going to have when they get to
heaven, when they are with their husbands again. Well, for some dear women,
they don't want the preacher to even imply that they will have to put up
with their husbands again in heaven. They might change their minds!!!
The "meek and quiet spirit" is "in the sight of God of great
price." We
need to put God's value on this. We say, "So and so is a great Christian
because they give a lot of money, or, they are regular in church, etc." God
says, "This lady is a great Christian because she has a 'meek and quiet
spirit.'" It is of great value (has great worth) to God. Then next . . .
THE EXAMPLE FOR THE CHRISTIAN WIFE
Peter says, "For after this manner in the old time the holy women also who
trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection to their own
husbands." Note the following:
1. There were holy women in old times. The word "holy" is translated
"saint" in other places. It means that these women were separated believers
and stood out as such. Holiness does not hide. It is evident in the life of
the person who is holy.
2. Holy women were known for their faith in God. It says they "trusted
in God." The word "trusted" translates "elpizo" and means,
"to hopefully
trust in." It is used synonymously with faith in Romans 8:24.
3. The holy women adorned themselves appropriately. The word
"adorned" is the same as above only here it is in the imperfect tense. This
means that the holy women of old KEPT ON ADORNING THEMSELVES appropriately.
It was their practice
4. The holy women were in subjection to their own husbands.
Now we have a particular example. Peter says, "Even as Sara obeyed Abraham,
calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are
not afraid with any amazement." Sara is an example:
1. In her obedience to her husband Abraham.
2. In the respect she showed him, calling him lord.
The so-called liberated woman would have a difficult time with this. I can
hear her say, "I may call my little mousey husband SOMETHING, BUT IT WON'T
BE LORD!!! To be honest with you ladies, I know some men, I think if I were
a woman and married to them, I would have a difficult time with this truth
of submission. I think all of us have a difficult time in submitting. It is
against the flesh. We need to pray for one another and as Hebrews 3:13
says, "But exhort one another daily, while it is called Today; lest any of
you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin."
This meditation is presented to godly women who want to know what the Lord
Jesus is saying to them in this passage of Scripture. My recommendation to
all of us is immediate obedience to the will of God. We are the happiest
when we are exercising complete surrender to the revealed will of God.
May the Lord bless these words you our hearts.
In Christ,
Bro. Earl White
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